My greatest joy is telling people what Jesus has done for me. Some days I feel like I am about to burst. I want to tell every person I encounter about the truth, hope, love, and joy that can be found in a relationship with Jesus Christ. You can be redeemed! Set free! Made new! How incredible is that!? It blows my mind.
So why don't I always feel this way? Sometimes I think about my salvation and I don't "feel" anything. I get frustrated with myself for being ungrateful, for not being excited about sharing the good news. Even when I am excited about it, most of the time I hesitate to tell my friends about Jesus, for fear of what they might think. I get too caught up in my own desires and the focus becomes about me, not Him.
That's why it's so important to constantly remember what He has rescued us from. He has saved us from ourselves, from our self destructive sin. When we become blind to our own brokenness we can't understand why we need Him. When I take the focus off of myself, and onto what Jesus has done for me on the cross that's when my heart is overwhelmed with gratitude and adoration. When I get to share my testimony, when I get to see Him transform a girls life, when I get to see Him rescue broken people....that's when I get excited! This uncontainable excitement and JOY is the only appropriate response to His amazing love. Joy, pure joy. My deepest desire is to never let this fire for Him burn out. He will be my first love, always.
His glory is what I'm living for. There is so much PURPOSE found in living for Jesus. It just doesn't get any better. I know the Lord is calling me to ministry after college. I know that it will be hard and I'm not going to make much money, and that's okay. I'm going to gain joy that has far greater value than any material thing. If you love Jesus, you understand where I'm coming from. If you don't, its okay if you don't quite get it. Some of my friends and family don't really understand, but its not about what they think. It's about pursuing my passion and using the gifts that God has given me for His glory to further His kingdom. So that is what I'm going to do. I know persecution and struggles will come, but I also know that He is faithful and that following Jesus is worth it all.